Beautiful Brown Girl Blog:: Accidental Inspiration

Dr. Phil was right!

2012-01-08T20:29:00.000-08:00

Judge me if you will, but outside of watching "The Young and the Restless" I don't catch much daytime television, but I do sneak a peek at Dr. Phil from time to time when watching Maury is just a little much. Dr. Phil has been on for over ten years now, and one piece of advice that he gives regularly is: "You teach people how to teach you."

When I first heard it, I didn't quite get it, I mean, I understood what he meant in a common sense sort of way, but being able to relate to it is something all together different. If you really think about it. It's true....we actually teach people how to treat us. If you act like a doormat, then guess what, you'll always have people stepping on you, and wiping their filthy shoes on you. Likewise if you act like the strong, always dependable (no matter what) fire hydrant then guess how the dogs will treat you?....well you get the picture.

Anyhow, now I'm not proposing that it's okay to go around acting "a hiney" to people, certainly not, but don't let them treat you any kind of way, and think that it's fine. A person that doesn't respect you, isn't someone that you should have around you, be it family, business, relationship, friend, etc. I've learned to be weary of the overly sugary sweet personae. I'm sure you've encountered the kind, online everything is roses and honey combs, they can't seem to find enough good things to type/say about you (even though they don't really know you), however in person, it's another story.

Well such was the case for me last year. I was excited to meet a designer in the industry who seemingly took an interest in my products. She'd befriended me on FaceBook, and shortly thereafter we met in person. Everything seemed fine initially, then I noticed a "change in the tide" so to speak during our conversation when I mentioned my stance on not wanting to live with my husband before we got married. Now granted, I didn't know anything about her personal life, and just assumed she was married, turns out she wasn't and was living with her long-time boyfriend. Now I was simply talking about the decision that my fiance (at the time) had made, but obviously I struck nerve.

A couple months later, I was at an event in which she was showcasing her designs and happen to be speaking to a mutual acquaintance when she walked up. I was so excited to see her (and her work up close and personal). I told her hello (twice), congratulated her (patted her on her back), to which she turned her back to me, stepped between me and the mutual acquaintance started a conversation with her, and then walked away....ignoring me...completely. Never one to let someone else ruin a good time, I forgave her, moved on through the crowd, met some wonderful people, participated in a raffle and even won a computer and original painting by a very talented artist!!

Fast forward a few weeks later, and I get a few sugary sweet inbox messages, photo comments and the like, along with a few introductions to others as her "friend" (oh really, now?). I just let it all go unanswered. Now some may ask why I didn't confront her, and to that I respond, with "why?". Confronting someone who is insignificant to my life, on something so blatant would have been a complete waste of my time, energy and brain cells.Excuses offered only set you up for it to happen again, plus I'd already taken notice to the various online rants disguised as posts, and thought it was a bit unprofessional, but this was key. Whatever someone will do in front of you, they will surely do it behind your back. So when I thought back on my experience with her, I realized that sadly this just who she is. When people show you who they are, believe them. I don't believe in asking for lies or excuses, I simply "Pray for 'em and keep it moving.". Everyone you encounter is not meant to be your friend or even acquaintance...some encounters should end after the introduction.

It is TOTALLY up to you, how someone treats you. If you don't believe me, just watch their patterns; most people are fully aware of their bad behavior, especially when it's reoccurring. The key is whether or not, you'll get in line for another serving.

And in this case, I must say, "No thank you, I'm full."

It's a NEW YEAR!

2012-01-07T22:52:00.000-08:00

Well we are just one week into 2012, and I am so excited with everything that has transpired in my life thus far!!! I know, I know, it's only been 7 days, but if you only knew how God has manifested His favor, you'd be amazed, so stay tuned!

With each new year, many make resolutions. I've never been the kind to make resolutions, but I have made two decisions. One is: there are only two kinds of moves that I plan to make this year: power and strategic; The other is: I will no longer allow anyone to waste my most precious seed - my time.

I pray that each of you reading this are experiencing the results that I am, and if you're not, that you will very soon. I know some of you have decide that this will be the year for you to step out on faith and do what some would consider the unthinkable. If starting a business is that decision, allow me to offer some friendly advice.

Research and decide what your niche (in that industry) would be. Think about what would make you (and your product) different from the current businesses that exist. What will you all offer that no one else does, in terms of services or products rendered?

The most precious thing that the Lord spoke into my spirit last spring was: "Everything you are looking for outside of yourself is already in you." Now at the time, I related that to a potential business relationship that I was looking to form. As it turns out, it was never meant to be and I later found out why; however I offer that same sentiment to you today. Look at the connections that you currently have? Who do you know that you could partner with to bring your business venture to fruition? What skills or passions do you posses that you'd do for free, but others are willing to pay you for? Think about it, write it down.

Habakkuk 2: 2KJV says, "And the LORD answered me, and said, Write the vision, and make it plain upon tables, that he may run that readeth it."

Outside of that, I would suggest that you pray about, take your time, plan it out, and go for it!

Never put a "?" where God put a "."

2011-12-25T16:19:00.000-08:00

Last fall, I met a beautiful young woman name Jenee Dionne. She's an extremely talented jewelry designer and blogger (among other things). Well I was reading one of her blogs and saw the poignant statement; "Never put a question mark where God put a period." That statement COMPLETELY struck my spirit. Not many things "shake me", but that did. Now doing just that may seem a bit drastic to some, but not to me. I've never had a problem hearing from the Lord, or even acting on what I heard. The few times that I did doubt what I'd heard, I prayed for confirmation and received it. I believe that you can experience the same thing, however you must have an established relationship with Him for that level of manifestation to take place.In this bold ritual of faith I've been asked, "Aren't you afraid of doing the wrong thing or walking away from the wrong person/opportunity/relationship?". In all honesty, at one time I was; there were times I felt so badly for how the other person was going to perceive my actions that I hesitated in doing what I believed I'd been told. I've since found out many a times that, delayed obedience is still disobedience. I'd rather risk missing the mark, than not shooting for it at all. I always assumed that if I'd acted in error that God's grace would cover me, because my heart would have been in following His word. Now on the flip side of that, when I have actually questioned what God told me, (putting that question mark where I should have left the period), say for instance in walking away from someone, I got burned.....over and over and over again.

You see, the lesson is clear and once you past the test, you never have to take it again. Here is the key, God knows a person's heart, He knows their intentions towards you, their true feelings about you, because nothing is hidden from Him. It is my belief that oftentimes He is attempting to move you out of harms way, be it emotional, physical, spiritual, or financial, but you have to trust Him. I'm not going to lie, this is far easier said than done.

A few years ago, God spoke to me one night in a vision regarding a childhood friend, with whom I'd recently reconnected. You see, that night, I'd been in deep prayer and emotional turmoil over her decision as to whether or not to have an abortion...within the week. Although she was married and seemingly well-off financially, she'd confided that she'd recently found out that she was pregnant and didn't want a second child. Looking back, the warning came very clearly. It was more of a repetitive dream.. He kept telling me over and over, "She has lied and will continue to lie." Well to make a very long story short, that warning was very hard for me to process, because I couldn't imagine why she'd lie or what she was lying about.

Boy was I wrong!! Not only did she lie about contemplating having an abortion, looking back she'd hidden her pregnancy from me from the beginning and for five months (hugging me from the side, hiding her belly with big purses, etc). Talk about being thrown for a loop! Well, I found out later that she'd become insanely jealous that (at the time) I had no children, my business was starting to really blossom, and felt threatened that I wasn't going to have any time for her...so what better way to distract my focus than to come up with a horrible scheme to get (and keep) my attention.

Well suffice it to say, when God told me to walk away, the second time, I did...and this time with no regrets. I wasn't sticking around to see what other psychological little tricks she had in store. But I am so thankful that He let me see just enough of her character to let me know exactly with what "spirits" I was dealing. I have never looked back. So going forward, I learned to not only listen, but to "do", regardless of what people may think about me.

Life is like a chess game and the best position to be that of His willing pawn. Let Him move you!

Reciprocity: The Lost Art of Balance

2011-12-15T23:16:00.000-08:00

The second half of 2011 has been very bountiful, I've been to many events either as a vendor or attendee and have met some very nice people. I don't mean nice as in their demeanor, although that did play a part, I mean nice as in wanting to share what they knew and offering suggestions on how could take Beautiful Brown Girl, Inc. to the next level. Simple conversations that I thought wouldn't go past, "Hello, how are you?" have turned into divine connections with individuals who were far more educated and connected than they initially let on. While that may seem "sneaky" to some, I love it!

I love it when I meet new people and they leave something to the imagination. I've found that such people have a lot more to offer than simple name-droppers and resume-readers...and believe me there's a LOT of that going on here in Atlanta.

I've always been intrigued by quiet people, those that know that a conversation isn't a monologue, but more of a really good tennis match with each side taking turns to see what else the other has to offer on a topic. I've never been impressed with loud people...ever. Frankly it's a turn-off and more of a cry for attention than anything else. It has been my experience that braggers are like the proverbial empty wagons, making a lot of noise, but void of any real substance. Those that truly are about something never feel the need to prove anything to anyone, and are far more interested in getting to know more about you and what you do; and in some cases they are secretly waiting to hear how they can help you. Quiet confidence is so attractive.

To me the most beautiful part of the divine connections that I made this year is the reciprocity. Ahhh, reciprocity is a wonderful thing!!! Reciprocity is defined as the act of being reciprocal or related to each other in such a way that one completes the other. It is truly a pleasure meeting someone who isn't afraid to share information that they have. To me, having reciprocity in any relationship embodies not only selflessness, but confidence, as well as empathy. Unfortunately my past is littered with too many crabs in the barrel that never had an interest in me, only what I could give/offer them, so I am extremely thankful for the Lord pruning those people off of my tree and letting the branches of reciprocity flourish!

Do you hear what I hear....?

2011-12-15T22:48:00.000-08:00

In the midst of the Christmas season one can't help but hear Christmas songs (or instrumentals) while shopping. I suppose it would be an atheist's nightmare *smirk*, but I digress...anywho one song that always come to mind is "Do you hear what I hear" and some its lyrics are as follows:

Said the little lamb to the shepherd boy
Do you hear what I hear
Ringing through the sky shepherd boy
Do you hear what I hear
A song, a song
High above the tree
With a voice as big as the sea
With a voice as big as the sea

The song goes on from there detailing the news about the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Well I would like to pose the question to you...yes you, don't look around, I'm talking to you! Do you hear what I hear?

I hear the sound of the Holy Spirit urging you pursue your dream, get that degree, start that business. I hear the wings of the angels rushing past you as they fly to line up what some would consider "chance encounters", or as I would like to call them, divine connections to take you from one level to the next. I hear the sound of potential obstacles being moved out of your way, like pawns on a chessboard, carefully orchestarated just so, simply because you took the first step...the step of faith. I hear the muffled sound of naysayers whispering behind your back, muffled because you are so far ahead of them that you can no longer hear them. I hear the sound of door after door, opening wide, welcoming you with a warm embrace. I hear the sound of applause of your cheerleaders who were eagerly supporting you the entire journey. I hear the prayers of intercessors quietly being spoken on your behalf. I hear the sound of sunglasses opening up and sliding onto faces because your future is just that bright! I hear the sound of the Lord saying, "Well done, my good and faithful servant." because you used every ounce of talent that He gave you to fulfill the purpose that He gave you while on this Earth.

So I ask again....."do you hear what I hear...?"

Still not convinced that it's your time? Well check out this life-changing resource by Joel Osteen:

The Gift of Peace

2011-12-14T19:11:00.000-08:00

Well there are less than two weeks left in 2011, and I must say I am very excited to see 2012 approaching. I am making some very big plans for 2012, personally and professionally. "What?" you may ask....well now you're going to have stick with me to find out. *wink*

Now don't get me wrong, although 2011 had many knocks and bumps for me, I must say that in the midst of it all was a very special gift...something that has eluded me my entire life....peace of mind.
I've found that when you pray for the Lord to order your steps, and you trust in the direction that He has for you, that you will find yourself wrapped in a blanket of bliss. Sure, some decisions may not make sense to you (at the time), or to anyone else (not that they matter), but if you avail yourself to the voice of the Holy Spirit, I feel that God has to honor your faith by granting you peace; peace in knowing that everything will work out just the way it's supposed to.

I never imagined how many precious brain cells I wasted on entertaining other people's foolishness and worrying about situations that I couldn't control. I mean, who knew that when you tune out all of the extra-curricular nonsense that there would be a pair of extra gifts nestled inside of "peace of mind" called "happiness" and "joy"?

Anywho, I pray that you end this year on a tranquil note and that the upcoming year brings you more serenity than you've every dreamed possible!

Need help in obtaining your personal peace? Stormie Orman provides personal insight on emotional healing and transforming your inner self.

Model Behavior

2011-11-15T18:09:00.001-08:00

I'm not a model, I just play one with Ms. Dee (my photographer)...*smiles*. Let's face it, at 5'1 and with these curves I'm far from a size 0.The chances of me gracing the runways of Milan are slim to none; not because I don't think that I could, I just have no interest...none. Now granted, being the girly girl that I am, I DO enjoy "playing dress-up", always have, however I don't think that that is my calling.

I could be wrong, but I'm going to need an awful lot of confirmation, (preferably an email from God@Jesus.com), before I pursue that avenue. So for right now, I'm just having fun...and a lot of it! I remember as a child designing wedding dresses using nothing more than some notebook paper and some colored pencils, yet somewhere between entering high school and college, I was dissuaded (heavily) from entering the field. Who knows what I could have accomplished? I don't regret it though, because now I design purses (for business) and my own apparel (for fun).

I'm quite sure many people are shocked at the latter part of that statement, because I don't broadcast owning a sewing machine...well uh, up until just now *smiles*, but reason being, when some people find out that you have a talent or gift, they immediately want you to either use it for them, or push you to put a price tag on it. I share enough of my gifts with the world, so neither of which appeal to me. Right now, it's simply an outlet, another avenue for my creative juices to flow, something just for me. So if you are so inclined to pursue your dreams or just enjoying a personal hobby, but all means DO IT! You only get one life, so you might as well have fun!

If you need help pinpointing your passion this little book is an excellent guide:

Photo Credits: DeeLee Photo & Video

Letter to my Younger Self....

2011-11-15T06:07:00.001-08:00

One of my Facebook friends posed a question the other day, asking, "Knowing what you know now, what would you tell your younger self?" There is so much that I would say, but the following points would be the most poignant.
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Dear Younger Self,

Daddy loves you more than he can ever say. Don't worry about never fitting in, you're not supposed to, it's not you, that's God's doing, pure and simple. You are to be celebrated, not tolerated, so when this happens (and it will), just keep moving. You are smart, you are talented, and your gifts will take you very far.You were made for greatness and greatness simply can not dwell amongst mediocrity (polar opposites).

Unfortunately, your childhood will not be a happy one, but I'm sure you already know this by now. Just remember that the things you are being told about yourself daily (ugly, dumb, fat, and stupid) are lies spurn from the deepest envy you will ever encounter. You are beautiful! Everyone can see it, so don't take so long to see it for yourself. 1993 will be your best and worst year, but it will all work out in the end. Your greatest heartbreak will appear to be not attending Spelman College, but believe it or not, Clark Atlanta University will not only pay you attend, but will also introduce you to your husband, protector, and father of your children. Definitely a win-win situation!

Although you will major in a field that you hate (computer information science), it will afford you the lifestyle that you've always dreamed of, so stick with it. You will encounter many who will try to control you, and degrade you, but it's only because they don't love themselves.You are stronger than you can ever imagine. Your faith amazes me! You will endure and outlast. Many times in life, you may have to bend, but you will never break...satan will hate this about you, but it's OK, his story doesn't end that well anyway. Oh, and that little brother that's worrying the snot out of you right now, will end up being your best friend and defender...and at least a foot and half taller than you, so be nice.Your bond will be impenetrable. Satan will hate this as well.

Finally, I wish I could defend you from the the evils you'll face, but I can't, and seeing how in spite of it all how well "we" turn out, it'll only make you into the person you finally love today. Your life will seem like a revolving door of people, but it's only because you were made to be amongst many, not a selected few, so the sooner you accept this, the easier life will be.Never be afraid to walk away from situations and people void of love.You will have many testimonies of God's grace and favor, so much so, that you could easily be re-named "Joseph". In 1997, just know that you are not going crazy, it's just your spiritual gifts coming full circle...trust me on this one! God-willing, we still have many more decades to live, so continue to remain humble, thoughtful, open to what the Lord is telling you, He will never steer you wrong.

Oh and lastly, if you forget everything else, remember to buy stock in Facebook and Google. *wink*

Must be nice...

2011-11-14T07:24:00.001-08:00

When God's favor is upon you, it's hard for others to ignore. It's kind of like the sun, you can hide your eyes from it's glare, but that doesn't make it go away. Even the blind can feel it's warmth. It's always there, even when you can't see it, the sun is still in it's position, right where God hung it. The same goes for those who are blessed and walking in His favor. Everyone sees it, whether they want to admit it or not. His favor will cause people to be drawn to you whether they are cheerleaders or detractors; some will make their intentions towards you clear, others...well, not so much. I suppose it's human nature, but the hardest people to sift out are those who stick close to you, wanting to know every move you are planning to make, are seemingly happy for you, but truly aren't. The more you shine, the more shade they seem to throw your way.

In my experience, the easiest way to tell if someone is supportive of you and your dream or not it, is whether or not these three words flow from them on heavy rotation: "must be nice". I've been hearing this for most of my life, so much so that I call it the mantra of the envious. The issue is not necessarily that they want what you have, well I guess in some cases that may be true, but in most cases they want the favor that's on your life or the anointing that flows through you. They desire the grace that surrounds you, the talent that God placed in you, and sometimes even the endless joy that springs from your spirit.

In the last few months, the Lord has had me sequestered, in a sense from non-essential phone conversations. It was difficult at first, until He told me that none of those people could ever bless me the way that He could, so my concern should not be about them; besides they had "heart issues" that only He could deal with, and I needed to be obedient to Him. So, I did. Now granted, months down the road (and more revelation), I now see exactly what the Lord was trying to tell me. The same people that I allowed to eat up my time and focus were draining me of any energy and anointing that I should have been using to work within my business; and at the same time, speaking doubt into my life and business. Now, I don't blame them, I blame myself, because I allowed it to happen. Yet, as I followed what God told me to do, and started seeing the instant manifestation, I realized that I actually didn't miss them, the negativity or interaction. The Lord had me so busy that I simply did not have time to entertain anything (or anyone) outside of what He wanted....and for that I am truly thankful.

The truth of the matter is, if they themselves had their own relationship with Christ and knew how to celebrate who God made them to be, then they certainly wouldn't have time to be jealous. Just like light and darkness can not exist in the same place at the same time, neither can joy and jealousy. They are polar opposites. So while you are walking out your destiny and you encounter the "must-be-nicers", my advice is to simply do what the Word says, " Bless those who curse you, and pray for those who insult you." (Luke 6:28 ISV). Never water down who God created you to be, to placate someone else, until they are happy with themselves they will never be happy for you (or anyone else). As you continue to strive to do what the Lord would want you do, know that sometimes walking in love means walking away, after all you wouldn't want to be the cause of their third degree sunburn, now would you? *smiles*

Faith Is...

2011-11-13T11:39:00.001-08:00

We have less than two months to go before we embrace 2012, and all of its newest and expectation; however when I reflect back on 2011, I must say it has been interesting. The main lesson learned is there is always a new level of FAITH. In Matthew 14:29, we learn of Peter walking on the water. The verse says, '“Come,” he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus.' KJV.

In my years on this earth I have taken many a "walk on water". I have become enthralled with the anticipation of stepping out on FAITH, more so than being wrapped in fear. I have lived by the mantra that failure is simply, 'never having tried'. Let's face it, if you try something and it doesn't work, oh well, hey, everything isn't for everybody; but what if it actually DID work? Have you ever thought about that?

At the risk of aging myself,(LOL) I grew up during the age of Nintendo and the Super Mario Bros. series of video games. Now I'm far from today's avid gamer, but in my youth, I enjoyed playing Super Mario Bros, with my brother. Super Mario Bros, was a turn-by-turn game, meaning that you had to wait until someone else's character met its demise before you could play. Long and time-consuming, I know, but hey, it was the ultimate source of entertainment back then. Now granted, being the older sister, I had a couple of tricks of my sleeve long before the lengthy cheat manuals were created. My strategy was simple. As long as I maintained the master controller (and character, "Mario"), I could start or pause the game anytime I felt like it. So, I would wait until the opportune time for my brother's character to attempt to jump to one of the many moving ledges in the game and then pause the game. OK, now that's not something I'm proud of now, but it was funny (still is), well maybe not to him, but I still get a chuckle when I think about it. If I hit the 'start' button and my brother wasn't continuing to hold the directional 'arrow' button to keep moving...then guess what? His character would miss the ledge, fall in the pit, thus granting me my turn to play.

Playing dirty, I know, but hey, I was 13. (smile) Anywho, I was thinking about this past year, and my life in general (Peter vs. Mario Bros.)and realized that I have actually redefined FAITH. In thinking in terms of the video game, FAITH is not timing the moving of the ledge and hoping or wishing that you will miss falling into the pit, FAITH is stepping off the edge of the ledge and knowing that God will time the ledge to appear under your feet.

Resurrection Day

2011-04-29T14:06:00.000-07:00

This past weekend many people celebrated Easter or what some referred to as Resurrection Sunday. By Webster's definition, resurrection is a noun meaning, the act or an instance of bringing something back to life, public attention, or vigorous activity. I recently viewed The Passion of the Christ, and suffice
it to say; to see the depiction of His suffering, literally brought me to tears. Jesus was completely innocent, never having sinned, yet He took on the sin of the world so that we may be saved (John 3:16 KJV). I understand that the movie is one person's interpretation of what Jesus suffered, however I am positive that it was virtually impossible for any 'normal' human to have survived that type of torture. What moved me most was the last scene of the movie in which we see Christ (in the tomb) with sunlight on His face as the stone has been rolled way. He simply stands up and walks out; showing the nail hole in hand. In essence, He endured, He forgave, and He moved on to His purpose; sitting at the right hand of God (Mark 14:62).

This past Resurrection Day was significant for me outside of the holiday, I like to call it my Restoration Day, as it marked the 18th anniversary that I lost my virginity during a date-rape experience from a fellow Christian. From that time, each year I would dread April, and that date, but I am happy to say that I have been restored. The love of Christ has not only healed me, but restored me completely. I am no longer angry, bitter, or find it necessary to relive the incident. I no longer harbor any hatred in my heart towards the individual or the family member that said I was to blame for what happened. In fact, I have asked friends and family to pray for him; as his judgment was clear; he was arrested two years go for a federal offense.

The majority of people close to me were not only shocked to find out what had happened, because for the most part, I am a happy, out-going, positive person. My heart is always open and willing to help someone in need. Now granted, I know now, that I'd dealt with depression on some level, (as I'd carried the weight of what had happened), but like Christ, I got up, and moved on; suicide, while contemplated was not going to be an option. I entered Clark Atlanta University on a full scholarship that fall, graduated four years later (with honors); secured a corporate internship which later turned into my first managerial position; and am now the Chief Creative Director of my own company. I said all of that to say this; I don't believe that God wants us to carry the burdens of past hurts, pains and betrayals. As Jesus hung on the cross he said, "Father forgive them, for they know not what they do"(Luke 23:34 KJV) we are to be the same way. Forgive our enemies, pray for them, and move on into the purpose that God has placed in us.

It is impossible to drive forward with your car in reverse, and you can't move forward carrying baggage from your past. You have to accept it, learn from it, and press on. There is too much work to do for the kingdom, and too many souls that need to be ministered too. Most pity parties are parties of one. Let's be honest, no one wants to hear it, or see you wallow in a constant state of "woe is me", it is simply not attractive. There will always be someone else with a past a little worse than yours, so just be happy that you made it through and use your testimony to uplift someone else. Just like a balloon filled with helium cannot fulfill its purpose to fly to the heavens, if it is anchored down by something it is not supposed to carry, and neither can we ascend to our full potential in Christ, if we do not stand up, and walk forward one step at a time.

If you a dealing with an abusive past this book is an excellent resource:

The Closed Door

2011-01-13T16:41:00.000-08:00

My, usually independent, toddler has recently started to cry when his daddy closes a door and he is on the opposite side. It doesn’t matter if it is the bathroom door or the door to the pantry, if Malcolm is anywhere in earshot, he bursts into tears. He’s too young to understand, that he is too little to go outside unsupervised, or that his daddy is just taking out the trash and will be right back. All he knows is that he wants to be on the other side of that closed door and the situation is out of his control.

It made me wonder how many of us are like that when God closes a door in our lives. Whether it be a relationship, a job, a business, sometimes we can get so down-in-the-dumps about something ending that we rarely take time to think that maybe it was for our own good. Maybe that job ended because it was time for you to start your own business. Maybe that relationship ended because God had someone better for you, but you cried and tried to hold onto the person that wasn’t the best for you…all the while knowing in your heart that you were better off without said situation or person. Sometimes we get so caught up in what appears to be 'a loss' that we forget Ecclesiastes 3:1 assuring us that, "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven." KJV

I remember all too well about ten years ago, how I was enjoying my singleness and independence living on my own in Alpharetta, GA. I was employed at IBM, working on my MBA, my apartment was cute, and I relished in having peace and quiet for the first time in my life. Now the downside, and there was a downside, was that the young men who had taken me out while I was still living at home, had a new “outlook” on my living situation being that my daddy wasn’t around. Suffice it to say I had a lot of 1st dates, mostly due to the fact that each guy revealed who he was and what he really wanted upfront.

Just to name a few, there was the Shemar Moore-look-a-like who boasted of indulging in unprotected ménage-a-trois (hardly 1st date conversation), the successful entrepreneur who was ‘all of a sudden’ too tired to drive back home (call a cab, Buddy), the New Yorker (who I really couldn’t understand much of what he said) looking for a mother for his child who was conceived from a one-night-stand, Mr. Flatulence (no additional details necessary) and the NFL quarterback –built IT professional who was gorgeous but, just a little too interested in downloading his “flash drive” into my “memory database”. Needless to say, the once nice “gizmos” at my father’s house quickly turned to “gremlins” in Alpharetta. Each time I closed my apartment door, I admit I was a little disappointed, but somehow I knew that I was one step closer to who God had designed for me. I remember thinking that I would rather be alone, than to not have God’s Best.

In fact, I was having so much fun dating myself that my (now ) husband, who had re-entered my life briefly during that time, asked who was his biggest competition (for my affection), to which I proudly replied, “Me.” I was not interested in what he or any other man had to say. What he didn’t understand was that I was very comfortable with my own company. I took myself out to dinner, to the movies, to the spa, on a 4 day cruise and had a blast! I’d concluded that I didn’t to be with any man who couldn’t or wouldn't treat me better than I treated myself. I’d grown and realized who I was, and who I wasn’t. So while I waited, I decided the only black male I could tolerate was my new housecat, Victor Newman. Just God, me, and Victor Newman…who could ask for anything more, right? Well when I least suspected it, just in the middle of me “doing me”, love slipped up on me and cold-cocked me…a complete TKO. You see, after a tear-filled prayer for God to reveal to me who I’d marry…He told me…and my response was, “Him? …Seriously, God…really? Him? Aw’ man, c’mon…ANYBODY but ...him.”

Funny, right? True story….unbeknown to me, I’d met my husband when I was 18 and had hung out with him off and on for over 8 yrs; 6 of those years, I was seriously dating someone else (we shall call this guy, Dr. Unworthy). I had never once seen my husband as anything more than a friend…one who’d without hesitation spent his money on me, protected me, made me laugh, all the while getting on my last freakin’ nerve.

However…God’s plan was evidently clear, and after having loved me unconditionally during 8yrs of friendship, and 1 week after our first kiss (which lasted an hour…lol), my husband asked me to be his fiancé (the ring and official proposal followed three months later). We married exactly 9yrs to the day we met….and that was 8yrs ago. I can’t tell you how happy I am that I actually had the courage to ‘close the door’ and refused to tolerate what/who was not for me. After all, even the Word says, “You can make many plans, but the LORD’s purpose will prevail”. Proverbs 19:21 NLT

The Beauty of Transparency

2011-01-12T12:08:00.000-08:00

In the world of social networking and all of the various aspects of staying connected (text messages, video messages, Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, blogs, etc.) it seems that the body of Christ is more disconnected than ever; not necessarily in terms of not communicating, but in relational connectivity. Some of us seem to enjoy broadcasting a fictitious lifestyle where there are never any problems, issues or concerns. Some like to appear as if everything in their world is copacetic; birds are singing, bees are buzzing, their marriages are perfect, their jobs are ideal, their bills are minimal, and their children are flawless little diamonds. Now for a select few, those statements may be true, but for the majority of Christians that is not the case. In fact, in John 16:33, Jesus stated, "In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world," in a way our troubles bond us and demonstrates that we are more alike than we are different.

Now, I’m not suggesting that we print and wear our troubles on a t-shirt for the world to see, however I do believe that we should practice a little transparency. Showing others what God has brought us through, by His unfailing grace, can edify and build other brothers and sisters in Christ. Our testimonies can help give others a new perspective, hope, restore faith, give answers or be a light in someone else’s dark moment.

Attaining transparency is not instantaneous or easy feat. It takes years of realizing that whatever happened in your life, good or bad, happened to better you. Every story has three parts; a beginning, middle and an end. The Beginning was your past, what you learned, what you lived through, and how you triumphed. The Middle is your today, your application of the past lessons learned, your step-by-step, moment-by-moment growth chart. The End is yet to be seen.

We should never be ashamed of the trials we have lived through, because our story could be the first stepping stone to someone coming out of a heinous situation or even receiving Christ. Your telling another person, “been there, done that, and only through the grace of God I made it through”, could very well be the answer someone else needed. As humans, our greatest desire is to feel accepted. While we live individual lives, we all still want to know, in some respect, that we are not alone; that “I am not the only one to ever experience this”. There is a very thin line between being a nosey gossip and someone authentically seeking spiritual solutions. Those seeking spiritual solutions are less concerned with the blow-by-blow your story, but rather how you made it out, the scriptures you stood on, and the prayers that you prayed.

We should never be clandestine about how God has blessed us or shown us His favor, for that testimony could very well be the key to winning another soul to the Kingdom. I remember being a sophomore at Clark Atlanta University and having my academic scholarship extended to cover room and board in addition to tuition. Just as the school year began, someone advised me to not mention my scholarship to my new on-campus friends, or else they wouldn’t be my friends anymore. Although I have never been one to brag, I knew that that mindset was a foolish one. Either someone would appreciate me for me or not. I didn’t think it was right for me to pretend like I had student loans or promissory notes just to be accepted; after all we were all there for the same thing, higher education. In high school, I had worked very hard and I didn’t think God would appreciate me downplaying my blessing to make someone else feel comfortable. So in retrospect, the one person who’d ended our friendship after finding out about my scholarship had shown signs of jealousy way prior to finding out. Other friends that found out are still friends with me to this day, and cheering me on at every accomplishment.

Last year, I attended a networking event and connected with a lady who on the outside appeared that we had absolutely nothing in common. We were introduced to each other, started talking and before you knew it, we’d talked for well over an hour and I left the event feeling like I had not only known her all of my life, but that I had a new friend. It was our transparency that allowed for a beautiful connection to occur; knowing that not only have we experienced similar things in life, but also the fact that she could discern some current spiritual issues that I was facing, was nothing short of God. If we had not been genuine with each other and confident in whom we are individually, that bond would never have taken place.
Never be afraid of being transparent, because chances are, what you thought you were hiding was visible all along.

Laboring to Rest

2011-01-01T07:51:00.000-08:00

Webster defines Labor Day as…a day set aside for special recognition of working people: as a: the first Monday in September observed in the United States and Canada as a legal holiday. Hebrews 4 talks about entering God’s rest, but what does that mean? I would like to think that it means receiving a vision from God and doing all that you can (in the natural) to bring it to past. In the past few years, verse 3 of this scripture has brought me much peace; the first time was during a lay-off. It was during this time that I worked on a couple of visions (now businesses) that I received from God. My spirit led me to Hebrews 4 (AMP), but I found that peace resonated from verse 3: [His] works had been completed and prepared [and waiting for all who would believe] from the foundation of the world.

I take pleasure in this verse because being that God has already laid the foundation and the end, from the beginning , all I have to do is “rest” in knowing that “it will” happen. Often times I fell prey to what I call the “when God, when?” syndrome. You know the frame of mind that leads you constantly ask God, “when” something is going to happen, like, finding the one, getting married, having a child, getting the job, getting the raise, having your business turn a profit. That thought pattern can definitely make you weary because it opens the door just wide enough for Satan to start to respond. Oh yes, he will be more than happy to start to speak doubt into your heart, ultimately choking the very seed of faith you’ve planted. He wants to you move from a place of faith to a place of fear. He wants you to believe that what God said, won’t come to past. The enemy will be overjoyed to provide distraction after distraction to keep you focused on people and situations that are not of God. Satan’s job is to kill, steal, and destroy and that’s exactly what can happen when you don’t have peace about what God said.
Have you ever heard the phrase, “God said it. I believe it. That settles it”? That is the kind of faith and determination you have to have to enter into God’s rest.
Let’s be honest, sometimes the very thing we think we want is sometimes the one thing we aren’t truly ready to handle. In my own life, I’ve worked many years in various corporate Informational Technology departments. I’ve encountered supervisors, co-workers, and customers that were mean, jealous, hateful, and down-right manipulative. It wasn’t always easy, but I appreciate each experience now, because it taught me how to not only deal with all personality types, but the spirits behind the behavior. Being a Christian entrepreneur does not entitle you to exclusive Christian employees or customers. Some of the same “spirits” I dealt with in corporate America showed up in my business dealings. I learned that I once I passed the tests on my 9-to-5 jobs, they were no longer a challenge in my entrepreneurial pursuits. I learned most times someone else’s unsavory behavior towards me had less to do with me, and more to do with their own self-deprecating thoughts.
No different than a child advancing from one grade level to the next, you have to pass the spiritual maturity test, which is an ongoing process. We are all works-in progress, but the process is easier to embrace once you have made up in your heart and mind, that no matter how long it takes, what God promised you will come to pass. Numbers 23:19 clearly tells us that He is not a man that He should lie, nor the son of man that He should change His mind, that in itself, should be reason enough enter into God’s rest with a joyous and peaceful heart.

Weight Loss

2010-01-11T15:52:00.000-08:00

It’s the New Year and many people will make the ominous resolution to lose some weight; not in the physical sense, but in the spiritual. I have recently shed a few hundred pounds, with minimal effort. How so, you may ask? Easily…I removed those people around me that no longer promoted me growing spiritually as a person.

During a quiet moment, God revealed to me that through the course of my life, I had a bad habit of keeping hurtful people near me, regardless to what they had done or said, out of fear that I may one day need them. He also revealed that I, like many of you with giving hearts, always seemed to be surrounded by what I like to call “takers”, however it was only because I allowed them to be there. I recently took a moment and scrolled through my cell phone contact list and found that about 70% of the contacts listed, only called me when they wanted something, whether it was advise, free merchandise, a job, or assistance of some other kind. Needless to say, I shed a few more pounds as I hit the delete entry button and I must admit it felt good…very good.

Do you not feel worthy of the life God gave you unless you are the hero in someone’s story? Do some people think your initials are ATM (Automatically Their Money)? Are you holding onto an unhealthy relationship, plutonic or otherwise, just to keep from being lonely? I think at some point I have done all-of-the-above, but not anymore. I value my worth and you should do the same. When someone does not realize the purpose for a thing, they are destined to abuse it. The reality is Jesus is truly all we will ever need. When it seems that no one is there to support you, uplift you, or love you, He is always there. He said, “But the Comforter, which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you” in John 14:26 (KJV).

In the darkest of situations I always look to find God and the lesson to be learned. Only then, did I discover the following: when I finally let go of the counterfeit friend, God showed me new, true friend. When I walked away from the selfish boyfriend, He showed me my husband, who had always been there patiently waiting on the sidelines. When I walked away from the abusive individuals in my life, God revealed the ones who were there with open arms, wanting nothing more than to love me and help me. When I finally listened to God, and let go of the guilt of walking away from, it was only then that the blessings truly started to flow unhindered in my life.

There is nothing wrong with people coming and going, in your life. God said in the beginning of Ecclesiastes 3 (KJV), “To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven”. There are some people who do not need to be in your inner circle. There are some people who cannot handle your blessings or achievements because they have chosen to do nothing great with their lives. There are some people who cannot handle your joy and happiness, simply because they do not believe that they have anything to be grateful for in their own lives. There are some people who cannot handle your strength because they know they could never live through what you have and still smile. There are some people who you just have to pray for and love from a distance besides, everyone is not meant to be in the front row of your life, some people need to observe God’s blessings (on your life) from the balcony.

This article appeared in the January 2010 Issue of DivineInspirationsMagazine.org

This resource explains the various types of Emotional Vampires and how to deal with them.

Keep Moving Forward!

2009-11-09T21:10:00.000-08:00

If you’ve been blessed enough to receive a vision from God, it is truly exciting and exhilarating experience. You want to share it with everyone around you. The Word tells us in Proverbs 4:23-27 (The Message) Keep your eyes straight ahead; ignore all sideshow distractions. Watch your step, and the road will stretch out smooth before you. Look neither right nor left; leave evil in the dust.

I meet a lot of people that are stymied in their ability to move forward in the vision that God has given them. The justifications are many; sometimes it is an unsupportive spouse, a time-consuming job, the daily trials of parenthood, or simply no confidence in their ability to bring it to fruition. Sometimes someone close to them has planted a seed of doubt, or even out-right laughed at their idea. I have personally dealt with people who have spoken doubt into the visions that God has given me for my endeavors and I quickly learned that those have no vision of their own, are quick to shoot down yours. It is sad, but it seems as if those people who don’t know that they can do all things in Christ (Philippians 4:13 KJV), have no desire to see others accomplish what they themselves do not even dare to dream.
When you have been called to greatness, there will not always be accompanying audience waiting to shower you with applause. In fact, you may find quite the opposite. Sometimes you will hear only the voice of God or the urging of the Holy Spirit to step out of your comfort zone; and in essence that is all you really need. You’ve heard the old saying, “it’s lonely at the top.” In the stories of the Old Testament, God used men and women that He had set apart. There will may be many times that you have to encourage yourself, as David did (1 Samuel 30:6 KJV). I have found it helpful to surround yourself with like-minded people. It may take time, but remain prayerful about the people in your inner circle. A vision from God is like a precious unborn child, it is to be protected and nurtured at all cost, and not everyone should be allowed in the delivery room during the birthing process.
In Genesis, chapter six, God gave Noah the charge to build the ark. Genesis 5:32, states he was 500 years old. When Noah entered the ark, he was 600 years old. At the absolute most, it took 100 years. I am sure that during that time there were hundreds of naysayers and hecklers offering their unsolicited opinions. I bet they laughed until their sides ached, and had many a joke at his expense, but in the end, God’s perfect will was done and we can all agree that one day… it did indeed rain.

So in times of doubt, and uncertainty just remember that the word tells us that God is not a respecter of persons (Acts 10:34 KJV), therefore if He did it for one, He will do for another. I was once told that,” God’s will is God’s bill”, and “God’s vision, is His Provision”, however we have to make sure that we do our part by staying in prayer, walking in love, and at the very least continue moving forward.

In this resource, Bishop T.D. Jakes gives life-changing advice on how to live your life without regret, simply by counting the cost of every decision. Check it out!

This article appeared in the August 2009 Issue of DivineInspirationsMagazine.org

Watch Your Mouth!

2009-11-09T21:05:00.000-08:00

A lot of people often say, “God is in control” or “It is what it is”, but do you know that you have the power to dictate your circumstances? Yes, you have the power to change your family, spouse, children, finances, job, business, and even your weight. As a burgeoning business coach, I often hear my clients say negative things about their businesses or organization. Things like, “Oh I’ll never figure it out,” or “No one will ever buy my product”, or “I’m not smart enough to do this”, and for all intensive purposes each statement is true…simply because they spoke it.
Anyone who has read the bible, knows that the Book Genesis is not only the first book, but also the book in which we learn how God created the earth. It’s a very simple fact, but one that many of us miss. When God desired to create something that was not there, He simply spoke it. For example, in Genesis 1: 3-4(KJV), the Word tells us, “God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and He separated the light from the darkness.” First God said it then He saw it. In the first chapter of Genesis, nine times God says something and three times He called something into existence and it appeared. In that same chapter, verse 27 tells us that God made male and female in His image; so if you believe that God made you and He made you in His image, then you have the same ability to “say and see” what you want in your life.

The lifestyle change comes when you learn to speak positively over the aspects of your life before they become issues. For example, my husband and I spoke positive things over our baby before he was conceived, during the pregnancy, and even now that our son is almost a year old. The hardest part is coming in contact with people who don’t believe what we do and say something like , “Oh he’s a Taurus man”, when they find out that our son’s birthday falls in the month of May. While the world embraces zodiac signs and horoscopes, my husband and I do not. We know that Leviticus 19:26 (Amp), speaks against the horoscope, and likens it to witchcraft therefore we have to give correction in love, and rebuke the things spoken over him by replying, “No, he is a child of God”. Some people make think that it is not that serious, but we do not want anyone or anything corrupting the precious seed that we have planted in his life.

This principal can be applied in every area of your life. If your finances are not where you want them to be, then tithe faithfully (Malachi 3:8-11 KJV) and continuously speak what you want. If your health is not what it could be, speak that you are healed in the name of Jesus and most importantly, do not continue to proclaim that you have the illness. If your children are not acting appropriately, (and you have taught them differently), then continue to stand on Isaiah 54:13, and speak that “great is the peace of my children”. If your marriage is not as happy as you know that it can be, then speak daily, “My husband loves me, as Christ loved the church” Ephesians 5:22-24(The Message).

Now mind you, it may take some time to see the harvest of what you are speaking, but if you keep speaking positively over whatever it is you want to change, eventually you will see the manifestation of your words. Just like seeds that farmers and gardeners plant, nothing springs up over night. It takes time, but with constant watering and care, the harvest will be seen.
This article appeared in the May 2009 issue of divineinspirationsmagazine.org

Spring Cleaning

2009-04-22T13:28:00.001-07:00

Springtime is upon us and it is time to renew, recharge, and freshen up the world around us. Many of us will be doing what is commonly known as "Spring Cleaning." To many, spring cleaning consists of rearranging our closets, putting a fresh coat of paint on the house, changing air filters, or even switching our drapes and curtains for a brighter look. The Webster dictionary defines spring cleaning as "the act or process of doing a thorough cleaning of a place." Usually during this time most people discard or donate items that no longer suit them. Broken appliances or clothes that no longer fit find their way to the nearest trashcan or donation center. Overall it is a time in which we remove a lot of material things that we no longer need or want. With this in mind, we can all apply the "Spring Cleaning" theory to our spiritual lives. All of us should take time to "clean out" the negative emotions and old hurts from the past that no longer fit who we are striving to be in Christ. Being hurt is human, it happens, however as born-again believers we should embrace every opportunity to attain a new level of spiritual maturity. While this is not an easy lesson, it is very necessary to move forward in the things of God. I can think of more than a few opportunities in which I could have taken offense to how I was being treated. For example, when I recently called a facility to inquire about hosting my son's first birthday party, I was very excited. I am a first-time mother, and this is not an event that will happen every day, so who would not be excited, right? Well to my surprise the customer service person assigned to assist me in making the reservation was less than friendly. She was quick to tell me that I had filled out the reservation form incorrectly, although I could not have possibly known the internal office information the form requested. In fact, she seemed very pleased to inform me that the date I wanted was no longer available. In retrospect, she appeared all too happy to end the conversation and go on with her day. Now, I could have re-lived the phone call to all of my family and friends over and over, demonizing the lady a little more with each re-telling, but I chose not to. It is so easy to take offense to what someone says or does. Being offended is a choice, and holding onto old grudges, feuds, and spats only block your blessings and hinder your hearing from God. In this day, and age, I simply cannot spiritually afford to block my blessings. So what did I do? I just chalked the entire episode to her having a bad day, asked the Lord to bless her and made alternative plans for my son's party.
Now was forgiving her the first thing I wanted to do? No. Was it the best thing to do? Yes. Constantly making the decision to "let it go" comes with time, patience, and practice. Each of us has a different walk with Christ, however it has been my experience that each time I have been mistreated in some way, the level (of maturity) in which I respond is almost a direct correlation to the level of blessing I receive. You see, I know all too well of the promises that God has place before me, and I refuse to let anyone, including myself, stand in the way of the manifestation. As I've gotten older, I tend to think of things from God’s perspective. In searching the scriptures I have found that God's Word is clear on the issues of forgiveness (Psalm 103:8-12). Forgiving others is a large part of growing into a mature Christian. Although it is not the easiest thing to do, we should always forgive those who sin against us, despite the magnitude of the offense. Jesus gave us the ultimate example of forgiveness while on the cross when he said, "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do."(Luke 23:24). Cleaning out our emotional closet (or letting it go) only helps to better you as a person. If there is no bitterness in your heart towards anyone, it ultimately makes you a happier person and easier to be around. Your spirit will be lighter, you will attract the favor you desire, and you can easily find delight in the things of God and the world around you.
This article appeared in the March Issue of the e-zine Divine Inspirations.

What's Love Got To Do With It?

2009-02-11T18:41:00.000-08:00

With Valentine's Day approaching, there are many women who are excited with the idea of receiving a token of affection from someone they are either involved with, or close to, or want to be involved with, however I wonder how many of them know that the true definition of love isn't found in a box of candy or a bouquet of overpriced flowers with a short life expectancy. Now don't get me wrong, I used to be hyped about Valentine's Day, when I was younger,only because I didn't feel loved the rest of year. Now that I'm older I enjoy love shown year round...the agape kind of love...the 1 Corinthians 13 (taken from The Message Bible) kind of love...never heard of it? Well read on...

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than for self.
Love doesn't want what it doesn't have.
Love doesn't strut,
Doesn't have a swelled head,
Doesn't force itself on others, Isn't always "me first,"
Doesn't fly off the handle,
Doesn't keep score of the sins of others, Doesn't revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best, Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

May you receive all the love your heart and hands can hold, not just on Valentine's Day, but every day of the year, and if you're looking for love, this book helped me outline what kind of mate the Lord had in store for me. It's a great, quick read...check it out!

Exit Ramp

2009-01-03T18:10:00.000-08:00

For those of you familar with Atlanta, you know the most well known highway is I-285. Well, for those of you that don't know, 285 goes around the perimeter of the city. It doesn't matter if you go 75mph or 40mph, it doesn't change the fact that 285 is a circle.

Such is life. Have you ever dealt with someone so frustrated by their own existence that they constantly complain about it? Only when you point out the nearest exit ramp, they reply with "Yeah, but....." Now they think nothing of proudly providing you with the hundreds of reasons why they can't get off of 285, not realizing that the same "but" keeps their butt just where they are (pun intended). Meanwhile you've actually taken the time to mapquest the course of your life, so you just might have a clue as to what you're talking about.

Now I know everyone hasn't had their life planned out since they were fifteen, but I've always been a big picture person, and I suppose I always will be...its proven very effective for me. I know some people have had circumstances beyond their control, however I've realized that some people are just plain 'ole lazy. Like pigs in their own slop, they are so content in their complacency that they'd rather waste your time and drain your brain for solutions to their problems that they will never use and advice they will never take.

So to those of you moving foward in life, just remember its OK to care about people, just don't make their problems your own, because let's face it, even hamsters love their little wheels to nowhere.

Smooches,
~ssj

PS...for those of you going the wrong way, God allows for U-turns!

What's Your Sign?

2009-01-02T22:59:00.000-08:00

OK, I've been meaning to write this for a long time, but am just now getting around to it. I figured with the New Year in full swing, many people will be turning to horoscopes to predict how well or poorly 2009 will go.

Now sure, I was born in June, but I don't buy into that Gemini stuff....at least not anymore. I mean, have anyone really taken the time to truly think about what you're professing over your life? Let's take a look, shall we....

Characteristics considered positive for Gemini:
Adaptable
Communicative
Inquisitive
Intellectual
Charming
Multitasking
Entertaining
Upbeat
Witty
Whimsical
Attention-loving
Creative
Energetic
Positive
Imaginative
Outgoing
Optimistic
Clever
Dynamic
Youthful

Characteristics considered negative for Gemini:
dualistic
self-interested
restless
over-stimulated
fickle / inconsistent
impatient
vain
critical
playing of mind games
boastful
ego-oriented
tricky
temperamental
"two-faced"
insensitive
mercurial

Now I know some of you may say, "Well what's so bad about the positive things?". My response is this...why would I want to box myself into this limited list of qualities when God's word and will for my life offers me so much more? If God spoke the world into existence (and He did), then why would I want to speak any of these things over my life, and believe me...I used to, proudly and boldly. But believe me ignorance is not always bliss, sometimes it is damning (Hosea 4:6). When you learn better you do better, (well at least some people do), and once I got deeper in the word, I found out exactly what it said about "following the stars". Leviticus 19:26 says (in the amplified bible)...You shall not eat anything with the blood; neither shall you use magic, omens, or witchcraft [or predict events by horoscope or signs and lucky days].

Yep, you read right, horoscope signs are right up there with witchcraft! For those of you that are interested in a another outlook, here you go...http://www.gospel.com/topics/horoscope

So PLEASE stop labeling yourself with Satan's title and learn WHO YOU ARE in Christ. And from now on when someone asks you, "What's your sign?" Why not tell them...."Christian"?

Smooches,
~ssj

What Me Worry?

2008-12-07T18:41:00.000-08:00

As a child, I used to enjoy reading MAD Magazine. Right now, I can't exactly remember why other than the Spy vs Spy comics, but I did enjoy them. On the cover of each was this freckled-face kid named Alfred E. Newman. His mantra was simple, "What Me Worry?", and while as a child I never really understood that. I do as an adult, but more on a spiritual level.

I was reminded of a thought that I had last year on vacation and again this year, as I looked out of the balcony our hotel room. What I saw was still and serene, yet powerful and potentially deadly. It could bring hours of joy or a lifetime of sorrow, yet it was all under God's mighty control...the ocean.The thought occurred to me, if God can keep this vast force of nature at bay, allowing it to venture just to the shore then ebbing back, (not flooding the entire earth) then surely He can handle any situation in my life. Makes sense when you think about it, huh?

Smooches,
~ssj

"Happy" ain't just one of the seven dwarfs...

2008-12-05T22:13:00.000-08:00

"Tis the season to be jolly, fa, la, la, la, la, la, la,la,laaaa..." Ok, well I think I put enough la's in there. LOL

Anywho, I was moved to write about happiness. I was having another deep conversation with my twin :) and he informed me that I am one of few people who are truly happy. (huh???) Honestly, I can't say I was always this way, (you'll have to catch the E! True Hollywood Story for those details.. haha), but all in all I have to give my renewed state of bliss to my absolute Bundle of Joy, born this past May. The pregnancy was a breeze (no morning sickness, no gestational diabetes, only an 11 lb weight gain), but I really wasn't surprised by that, because my husband and I spoke/prayed all of that into existence before conception....literally! (ok that might be TMI). Now the delivery was a testimony, which included an emergency c-section, and the baby's resuscitation (his heart stopped twice), but in true form, just like his parents, my baby is a fighter, and we both stomped on Satan's head, because guess what...we are still here!!

Now my little bundle is almost 7 months old, and is crawling!!! (Lawd, help me!) He is getting into everything, and I am loving every minute of it. In fact, I am thoroughly enjoying my childhood. I won't say re-living it, because honestly that's most of the E True Hollywood Story. (lol)....but seriously, as long as he and "hubby" are fine, nothing else matters....nothing.

Even as I type this, hubby is a bit perturbed with me, because I can't list six things that I want for Christmas...so,to make both of us happy I decided to go the easy route and listed..."Giftcards!" Ha, ha. Anywho, he asked (even more patiently) "What is the one thing you want to open on Christmas day?", at that moment, my son was giving me a very juicy kiss (he's teething), and I told him, "I already have it." I think he finally got it.

So for those of you who are already in a State of Bliss...stay there...there are too many things happening in this world to bring you down. For those of you who are struggling to achieve even the smallest aspect of happiness...might I suggest you read"Could Be Worse!" by James Stevenson, it's actually a children's book. In fact, it was one of my brother's favorites as a child and believe me, he checked it out from the library ad nauseam!! (well to me anyway).

Although the message was repetitive, it was true and simple, no matter what you're going through, "it could be worse"; or as I like to state as an adult, "You may not be where you want to be, but you sho' ain't where you used to be!"

Smooches,
~~ssj

Copycats, Wanna-bes, and Ain't-never-gonna-bes

2008-12-04T17:48:00.000-08:00

I wanted to encourage all of you who are moving forward in what God has called you to do. I've thoroughly enjoyed my journey thus far, however it has not been without a few "distractions" along the way. You see, since I started BBG, I have had at least 3 people I considered friends to seek my advice on how to start a business, because hey after all, its not the easiest thing to go from idealization to manifestation, right? Well as a real friend does, I listened, encouraged, counseled, and made suggestions, only for them to start manufacturing the exact product line that I have, some even the exact same fragrances. I don't have to tell you that each of these "friends", neglected to inform me of their true intentions. Suffice it to say it hurt....deeply.

Then I realized the Word says ...

Ecclesiastes 1:9 (King James Version)

9The thing that hath been, it is that which shall be; and that which is done is that which shall be done: and there is no new thing under the sun.

In other words, there's really nothing new under the sun. Satan has always attempted to copy/pervert/twist that which God has created (i.e. the Word never mentions an Easter Bunny or a Santa Clause, only Jesus Christ).

Anyway, for those of you that have experienced this same instance or even run into those I like to call "Dream Snatchers" (those individuals who have no dream/passion of their own, and live only to tell you why you CAN'T/WON'T accomplished what God has placed in your spirit), just remember ,"Leaders look forward, Followers look around."

Smooches,

~ssj

P.S. Today I proudly have less friends than fingers on a hand! HaHa!

My 2 cents

2008-11-30T12:36:00.000-08:00

Well this is my first "professional" blog (does myspace count?) and guess what...I have absolutely nothing to say. Those that know me personally know that's an oxymoron! :) I have some idea of what I want this blog to be, (hopefully interactive, if there is such a thing) and will do my best to keep it going. That said, with 3 thriving businesses and a very active 6 month old, who is beginning to crawl, I'll be doing good to get on here once a week (who says you can't set the bar low? lol). I'm new to this, so I will approach this like a kid learning to ride a bike...pushing one pedal down at a time...I have no idea where I'm headed, but you are welcome to come along for the journey.